14 Small Things You Can Do To Make Your Partner Feel Appreciated

If your partner makes coffee every morning before work a little way to make them feel appreciated is to wake up a few minutes early and start it for them. There's nothing like waking up to the smell of freshly brewed coffee and the smell is sweeter when you realize your partner woke up to make it for you and make your day go a little smoother. 

Contributors: Alyssa Meyer from Rocket Deals

People have amassed several experiences in life by the time they’re dating. There are ideas, conscious and unconscious, from those experiences that impact each of our viewpoints when it comes to what it means to love and to be loved. So since love isn’t a one-size-fits all prescription, listening to what your partner is actually saying is crucial to them feeling loved.

Are they deeply touched when you take something off of their plate around the house? When you buy them that item they offhandedly mentioned they really liked? When you think of things to do to spend quality time together? We have ideas about what we think love is, and at times can impose those ideas on our partners. Do you go through elaborate lengths to plan a surprise party, which is something you really enjoy doing, when in fact your partner would really prefer an intimate night out?

They may see the effort in your attempts to love, but to truly feel loved, doing something they appreciate, or being with them in a way they find meaningful, will connect you both more deeply in your relationship.

Contributors: Wanda Duncan from Asha Live Breathe Heal 

I always fill the 5-gallon gas can when I fill up my car so that the lawnmower and snowblower always have gas ready to go.I take the recyclables up to our town recycle bins and never complain about the fact that stinky cans and bottles are in my nice car (even though I rinse them well).Often I mow the lawn before he comes home from work so that we have more time to be together when he comes home.

Contributors: Stacey Greene from Stronger Than Broken

As a wife I do things like buy or make thank you cards and write a little note thanking my husband and telling him I appreciate all his hard work for our family, or thanking him for something specific. I write notes on napkins and put them in his lunch that I make him to take to work. And sometimes just hugging him and giving him a kiss with an I appreciate you whispered in his ear does the trick. 

Contributors: Dorina Lantella Martirano from Dorina's Kitchen

There have been times in our almost 30 years that I have been aggravated over something... and instead of sharing the aggravation, I tell him I appreciate him or what he's doing. The aggravation becomes gratitude on my end and he ends up being more appreciation worthy because he was shown appreciation- and the original reason I was aggravated disappears! It's the little things that count, but the actual words I appreciate you are a magical tool in a relationship. It works with my kids too. 

Contributors: Dorina Lantella Martirano from Dorina's Kitchen

So often in intimate relationships, we *assume* we know what our partner needs to feel appreciated. But the reality is, we all have different needs at different times, and so it’s important that you communicate with your partner, and don’t assume that they feel appreciation in the same way that you do. For example, sexual fulfillment may be important to one partner, while conversation might be a top priority for the other. Or perhaps you feel appreciated by receiving compliments while your partner feels appreciated by receiving gifts. Keep in mind that the more likely you are to fulfill your partner’s needs and make them feel appreciated, the more likely they are to do the same. 

Contributors: Jennifer Blough from Deepwater Counseling

To help your partner feel appreciated, the most transformative thing you need to do is focus exclusively on your partner when your partner is talking to you. If you pause to stop multi-tasking when your partner is expressing something to you - even if it's something trivial - to concentrate fully on what your partner is saying, your partner feels like he or she is at the center of your world. And your partner actually does move into the center of your world that way. 

Contributors: Bracha Goetz from Bracha's Books

There are many small things you can do to make your partner feel appreciated, depending on their love language. some like gifts, some like words, some like quality time. Imagine you want to show your partner gratitude because they've been working oh so hard, so you take them out to a nice dinner, the table is ready and reserved for you two, the bottle of her favorite wine comes readily on the table, even with their faces on top of the caps of the bottle.

Contributors: Jayson Rosero from Think Expansion

While we think of someone we love (or even like), we often imagine winning them over with some grand gesture that will for sure make them fall in love with us. There could be no way that anyone would say no to a choreographed song and dance or at the last minute showing up at the airport to stop you from leaving them. However, often it's not the grand gestures that make someone feel loved, it’s the little details someone notices and chooses to take action from. Ending on that note, there are several small things you can do to make your partner feel appreciated. 

Contributors: Carlee Linden from Best Company 

I love to clean. Cleaning helps relax me after a long day at work, and I feel accomplished as I manage to make progress in a busy house. However, there is one chore that irritates me like no other. Doing the dishes is something I’ve always hated. Now that I live in a home with no dishwasher, my dislike for the chore has only increased. However when I’m at work, every morning my husband finds the time to wash the dishes and put them away. It is not only something he does without me asking, but he also doesn’t complain. This not only shows me that my husband listens to my rants about hating the dishes, but he cares enough about me to take the time to make sure they’re done. 

Contributors: Carlee Linden from Best Company 

A few tips from our new activity book for couples in long distance relationships include:

• Sending good morning and good night messages so that your partner has something to look forward to when they turn on / off their phone and start and end their day. 
• Getting in the habit of sharing one thing you're grateful for about your partner / the relationship each week. 

Contributors: Sam Laliberte and Jared Schachter from #LDR Activity Book

Physical touch is another way to feel appreciated. Physical connection is innate to feel loved and appreciated, whether it’s a hug or holding of a hand, the gesture leaves someone feeling valued and appreciated. 

Contributors: Colette Lopane Capella from New Day Vitality

Saying nice things to your partner, about their attire, skills, personality traits, actions are ways to help them feel noticed. Being very specific is important. The shirt brings out their eyes, the time they took to make your favorite dinner, how sweet they were to the little boy at the store, etc., are much more meaningful than a generic you look good or that was nice. 

Contributors: Lesli Doares from FoundationsCoachingNC

To show your appreciation for someone, firstly, I believe you need to pay attention to what they like and what brings them joy. Women love it when you do something that's extremely difficult to do when you're a man and that is to just listen. If you know from your conversations together that she loves a certain type of chocolate, a flower, fruit, or something like a massage, then getting her one of these specific things is how you show her you appreciate what she does for you. It also means that you were listening to her. The more detailed your token of appreciation, the better.

If she likes getting a massage, is it a deep tissue massage she desires? Or does she prefer a relaxing spa type massage? What's her favorite flower? It doesn't have to be her birthday, Valentine's Day, Christmas Day or any other special date. Actually, it's better if it isn't a special day. Picking any day randomly means you're doing it because you want to and not because you're obliged to. It shows her you're constantly thinking of her and not just on a public holiday or celebration.

Money should never be a problem either. You could show a woman how much youappreciate her simply by just taking her hand and dancing with her in an aisle of a supermarket. I know, I've done it.

Contributors: Jim Dailakis from ComedianJim